Some of you might remember my venture into professional baking. Since then, I’ve pretty much avoided measuring cups and mixers. Fear, mostly. I think that the kitchen utensils cower in fear when they see me coming. But last week I started looking at all of those beautiful cakes and of course, I thought to myself, “Pshaw! I can totally do that!” So with my trusty friend Google, I found the instructions for making one of those fancy whimsical cakes. You can see it here, but listen – unless you’re a baking legend like me, I wouldn’t suggest you try it. It takes years of baking and frosting practice to make one these cakes of pure whimsy.
So, apparently…it takes years of baking and frosting practice to make one of thsoe cakes of pure whimsy! I started with a great recipe for pound cake (it is recommended to use a heavier cake for these). The cake itself actually turned out really well. Then I started carving. Mistake #1: Not enough cake. As you can tell from the pictures, each tier needs three cakes. I had only two cakes total, so I improvised and made the first layer one cake, and from the second cake I cut two smaller cakes to use for the second tier. It could have worked. BUT, as I soon found out, the two layer thing is there for a reason!
Anyway, Mistake #2: trying to frost it with cheap arse Wally-world frosting. A rolled buttercream or rolled fondant is what one is supposed to use…but I figured since I was just experimenting this time, it didn’t matter. It totally matters. All the shape gets lost with that frosting.
I would show you a picture, but Bob and I took a few bites of it and then destoyed all the evidence by throwing it in the trash. He said, “I (emphasis on I) would be okay with that cake for her first birthday, even with the way it looks! BUT, forever, YOU would have to live with that cake because that’s the cake everyone is going to take pictures of! You’ll never live it down.”
He’s right. I guess I should move onto to bigger and better things than simply baking: DECORATING!! Bawhawhawhaw!!!!
(ps. I feel like I told this story like Bob and Kate tell stories, which means nothing to most of you, but it’s true!)